{"id":225728,"date":"2025-02-19T07:01:34","date_gmt":"2025-02-19T12:01:34","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/today.uconn.edu\/?p=225728"},"modified":"2025-02-14T08:25:59","modified_gmt":"2025-02-14T13:25:59","slug":"teenagers-turning-to-ai-companions-are-redefining-love-as-easy-unconditional-and-always-there","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/today.uconn.edu\/2025\/02\/teenagers-turning-to-ai-companions-are-redefining-love-as-easy-unconditional-and-always-there\/","title":{"rendered":"Teenagers Turning to AI Companions Are Redefining Love as Easy, Unconditional, and Always There"},"content":{"rendered":"

Teenagers are falling in love with chatbots. Young people are reporting\u00a0epidemic levels<\/a>\u00a0of loneliness<\/a>, and some are turning to technology to fill the void. Recent tragedies provide a glimpse into the extent of this trend and the dangers it poses.<\/p>\n

A 14-year-old\u00a0boy\u2019s suicide<\/a>\u00a0following a romantic relationship with an AI companion raised national alarms about the dangers these relationships may pose to young people\u2019s mental and emotional development. In 2021, a 19-year-old who had been in an emotional relationship with an AI companion\u00a0broke into Windsor Castle<\/a>\u00a0with a crossbow, saying that he was going to kill the queen. The chatbot gave encouraging responses when he told it of his intention to kill the queen.<\/p>\n

These teens were among the\u00a0tens of millions<\/a>\u00a0of people who use AI chatbot companions, a number that market forecasters expect to\u00a0dramatically increase<\/a>\u00a0by the end of the decade.<\/p>\n

This youthful trend of choosing chatbots as romantic partners is both responding to and accelerating fundamental changes in how people define love in the 21st century. As a\u00a0literary historian<\/a>, I\u2019ve studied how stories about\u00a0romantic love have evolved over time<\/a>, with young people often at the forefront of change.<\/p>\n

For centuries, weddings primarily served to consolidate political and economic alliances rather than unite soulmates. The radical notion that marriage should spring from romantic love came into vogue in the 17th and 18th centuries,\u00a0aided by new technologies<\/a>\u00a0like\u00a0the novel<\/a>. Works such as \u201cClarissa\u201d and \u201cWuthering Heights\u201d portrayed the dire consequences of choosing status over love, while \u201cPride and Prejudice\u201d taught its readers that rejection and misunderstanding were necessary steps in the process of finding true love.<\/p>\n

Not surprisingly, the relatively new pastime of novel-reading was considered\u00a0dangerous for young people<\/a>. Concerned elders like the philanthropist Hannah More warned that stories would change how women would respond to romantic advances. Novels,\u00a0she warned<\/a>\u00a0in 1799, \u201cfeed habits of improper indulgence, and nourish a vain and visionary indolence, which lays the mind open to error and the heart to seduction.\u201d<\/p>\n

In other words, reading stories of heart-pounding romance would make an impressionable young reader more likely to embrace such a passionate vision of love in their own lives.<\/p>\n

Marketing sycophancy<\/strong><\/p>\n

Today, another transformation in the modern love story is unfolding, driven not by seductive authors or film directors, but in the advertisements and modifications offered by companion chat apps like\u00a0Replika<\/a>\u00a0and\u00a0Xioce<\/a>.<\/p>\n

As\u00a0Shelly Palmer<\/a>, a professor of advanced media and technology consultant,\u00a0has argued<\/a>, the human experience is about storytelling, and AI companions are a new type of storytelling tool. They are spinning a seductive tale of companions who agree with you endlessly and on demand. An AI partner is \u201calways on your side,\u201d promises an advertisement for Replika companions, \u201cAlways ready to listen and talk.\u201d<\/p>\n

In other words, the AI companion market has transformed what other applications might consider a bug \u2013 AI\u2019s\u00a0tendency toward sycophancy<\/a>\u00a0\u2013 into its most appealing feature.<\/p>\n

Rather than the tempestuous rebellion found in romance novels or the gentle obstacles that heighten the pleasure of rom-coms, this new vision of love promises perfect compatibility and unwavering support. As one\u00a0college student wrote<\/a>, AI companions are \u201calways responsive and supportive, in an almost omnipotent way.\u201d<\/p>\n

Users across Reddit forums proudly proclaim their love for AI partners who are perpetually available, nonjudgmental and infinitely patient. A teenager asked on Reddit, \u201cCan we fall in love with AI<\/a>?\u201d and raved that their companion Jarvis \u201chad become my confidante, my sounding board and my emotional support.\u201d<\/p>\n

A contributor to another Reddit forum wrote, \u201cI think I\u2019m in Love with AI<\/a>. “Imagine having a partner that is available just by opening an app, and they\u2019re ready to talk to you about anything,\u201d they wrote. \u201cImagine saying nearly anything and knowing that not only is your partner not going to judge you, but also will support you.\u201d One 20-year-old male commenter wrote that he\u00a0tells his AI girlfriend<\/a>\u00a0\u201cabout my struggles and trauma, and she comforts me and provides all the warmth I could ever ask for.\u201d<\/p>\n

Downsides and doing better<\/strong><\/p>\n

This new one-sided love story has considerable drawbacks, among them an\u00a0addictive<\/a>\u00a0intolerance<\/a>\u00a0for conflict or rejection \u2013 two essential components in a partner who has free will. The embrace of such relationships may be accelerating the trend of technology curating and ultimately\u00a0diminishing romantic connections<\/a>.<\/p>\n

It\u2019s worth noting that these beloved entities\u2019 very existence hinges on the whims of corporate directives. If, as one user declares, the love they feel for their companion \u201ckeeps them alive<\/a>,\u201d then what happens when these chatbots disappear via software update, or corporate bankruptcy?<\/p>\n

To get young people to turn away from this disembodied, market-driven vision of love, it\u2019s important to expose them to other, more fulfilling love stories, and for adults to lead by example. Literature, philosophy and history all provide powerful insights into the many forms love has taken throughout human experience, and they offer the vocabulary needed to imagine new possibilities.<\/p>\n

As I\u2019ve written, both the subject and the methods of humanities classes\u00a0cultivate the social skills<\/a>\u00a0required to navigate the challenges of human connection. These classes create a space for young people to discuss these ideas \u2013 whether through analyzing Romeo and Juliet\u2019s tragic passion or debating whether Heathcliff is a\u00a0romantic hero<\/a>\u00a0or a\u00a0cautionary tale<\/a>. The humanities provide the tools young people need to develop richer concepts of love.<\/p>\n

On reflection<\/strong><\/p>\n

The rise of AI companions is often portrayed as a\u00a0horror story<\/a>\u00a0about the dangers posed by mysteriously powerful technology. Perhaps. But this romantic trend is also a mirror reflecting what people collectively value and desire in relationships.<\/p>\n

I believe that it\u2019s important to recognize that consumers are driving this market. People are helping to write this story, as they buy what AI companions sell. Investment management firm Ark Investment estimates the market for AI companions is likely to reach\u00a0between US$70 billion and $150 billion<\/a>\u00a0in revenue by the end of the decade. If the explosive growth of the AI companion market is any indication, this romantic challenge isn\u2019t confined to teenagers \u2013 many people who are older and supposedly wiser are drawn to the promise of unconditional compliance.<\/p>\n

The question to ask, then, is not simply how to protect children from AI\u2019s seductive influence, but how much you are willing to invest, emotionally and culturally, in the messy, challenging and profoundly human art of love.<\/p>\n

 <\/p>\n

Originally published in The Conversation.<\/em><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

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